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Stupid Quote

 There’s a quote that goes along the lines of “do it scared, because that’s the only time you can be brave.” Clearly, those people who say that have never had to do winkler titration or pipetting concentrated hydrochloric acid. There, being scared is a liability. You have to not be afraid of the deadly chemicals you have in front of you, or you end up with a syringe full of fatal chemicals jammed into your finger. Why yea, I did just fail the Chem 26 practicals (I just took them, but I’m almost sure I failed. Who passes with regular 3/10s). Completely my fault, I have absolutely awful anxiety that causes my hands to shake. Which again, is pretty bad when you have to handle deadly chemicals.  That’s all. I’ll just go cry in a corner now and disappear for another year.

Three Weird Things I Imagine a Lot

School vacation Not in the sense of having a vacation from school, but more of the school pays for us to go relax in a resort somewhere for a few days. There’s just something about the idea of having all of us be in a setting outside of schoolwork. There would be no graded worksheets that distract us from fun (looking at you astronight), and there would be no boring workshops or talks that take up too much of our time and teach us nothing we already knew (looking at you retreat, I’ve already forgotten what servant leadership is). As a massive tangent, I dislike these self-improvement seminars that just reiterate info you already know. It’s never engaging, and you completely forget anything you’ve learned after the seminar ends. If you disagree with me, name one piece of advice you learned and used from those seminars. Pisay used to do this a lot, and I think that instead of paying speakers to talk about mental health advice we won’t follow, all that effort and money is better spent on ...

The Periphery Behind Me

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I love late night thoughts (hello from 1:45 AM) There was a word I used to think about a lot. It’s called Ruckkehrunruhe (but with two dots on top of the first u. Sadly the font doesn't work with it.) Let’s look at its definition. n. the feeling of returning home after an immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your awareness—to the extent you have to keep reminding yourself that it happened at all, even though it felt so vivid just days ago—which makes you wish you could smoothly cross-dissolve back into everyday life, or just hold the shutter open indefinitely and let one scene become superimposed on the next, so all your days would run together and you’d never have to call cut. (Koenig, 2021) (For transparency, this isn’t a real word. It’s a made-up one for the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows. Then again, as Thor said, all words are made-up.) After trips, especially long and memorable trips, there’s two things I like to do. One, I often count how many days it’s been. I...